The air I breathe…

(I took all the photos around Voca, TX  – – such a beautiful spring!)

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I’ve been lost . . . for a long time, I think . . .

trail

There is beauty wild messiness. . . 

Sometime during the last few decades, pieces of me died. Things that once burned brightly, faded. I can still feel a tiny flicker under my ribs, but it’s just a faint warmth.

I got caught up in being accepted…being loved…being kind…being like everyone else…

(How honest should I be in this blog? If I share too much somebody might feel hurt…but isn’t that the attitude that got me here in the first place?)

I SOLD OUT.

I traded my spark for conformity. I traded freedom for safety.  And I lost myself.

stunning

No audience is necessary for beauty to exist… no approval needed.

I learned something the other day as I walked/ran (wan or ralked) with the dogs. The aroma of trees in bloom was bewitching.  I found myself inhaling more deeply than I usually do.  I realized I was being beautifully seduced by these wise, wild arboreal beings…actually by all things green and fragrant. As I inhaled the air, I benefitted from the oxygen and the enchanting scent. When I exhaled, I returned the favor as carbon dioxide. I visualized ribbons of CO2 rising to meet imaginary nostrils on leaves.

Without effort…without sacrifice…without losing myself, I was able to be a part of the circle simply by BE-ing. With a simple breath I gave easily and easily received.

butterflybluebonnet

Pollination starts with a thirst…with a desire…

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4 thoughts on “The air I breathe…

  1. Thank you for sending this to me. I’m so sorry you have been hurting so much. Is there anything I can do to help you? I have always loved you just for You THE AMAZING ANGELINA BONETTI DEANS. Not a people pleaser. I love that you are one with nature. I love how caring you really are. I don’t know how I would have gotten through things without you. I’m here for you, just for you. Please, always remember that.

    Lori

    Sent from Mail for Windows 10

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, my dear, sweet friend!!! ❤ You've always been such a love. I'm going to be ok…just coming to terms with things and blessed with some wonderful insights. Nature is definitely my teacher. Love you so much!!!!

      Like

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