(I took all the photos around Voca, TX – – such a beautiful spring!)
I’ve been lost . . . for a long time, I think . . .
Sometime during the last few decades, pieces of me died. Things that once burned brightly, faded. I can still feel a tiny flicker under my ribs, but it’s just a faint warmth.
I got caught up in being accepted…being loved…being kind…being like everyone else…
(How honest should I be in this blog? If I share too much somebody might feel hurt…but isn’t that the attitude that got me here in the first place?)
I SOLD OUT.
I traded my spark for conformity. I traded freedom for safety. And I lost myself.
I learned something the other day as I walked/ran (wan or ralked) with the dogs. The aroma of trees in bloom was bewitching. I found myself inhaling more deeply than I usually do. I realized I was being beautifully seduced by these wise, wild arboreal beings…actually by all things green and fragrant. As I inhaled the air, I benefitted from the oxygen and the enchanting scent. When I exhaled, I returned the favor as carbon dioxide. I visualized ribbons of CO2 rising to meet imaginary nostrils on leaves.
Without effort…without sacrifice…without losing myself, I was able to be a part of the circle simply by BE-ing. With a simple breath I gave easily and easily received.
6 thoughts on “The air I breathe…”
You will never be like “everyone else”. Dr. Seuss always says: “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” And, you are loved by more people than you could imagine. 🙂
You are such a blessing!!
Thank you for sending this to me. I’m so sorry you have been hurting so much. Is there anything I can do to help you? I have always loved you just for You THE AMAZING ANGELINA BONETTI DEANS. Not a people pleaser. I love that you are one with nature. I love how caring you really are. I don’t know how I would have gotten through things without you. I’m here for you, just for you. Please, always remember that.
Sent from Mail for Windows 10
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Thank you, my dear, sweet friend!!! ❤ You've always been such a love. I'm going to be ok…just coming to terms with things and blessed with some wonderful insights. Nature is definitely my teacher. Love you so much!!!!
Dear Angelina, Reading this, I know the timing and message of just-mailed missive shows how attuned we are. Hugs
I honestly didn’t think about the date of the letter…I just thought it was a direct reply to the blog. WOW! Seems we are in sync!!